THREE QUICK DRIVING OFFENCES

The Policeman couldn't believe his eyes as he saw the woman drive past him, busily knitting. Quickly he pulled along the vehicle, wound down his window and shouted "Pull over!"

"No" she replied, "they're socks!"

* * *

The Policeman pulled over a car and strolled up to the drivers window: "Excuse me sir, but do you know that you're driving without a rear light?"

The driver jumped out and ran to the rear of his car and let out a whimpering groan. The driver seemed so genuinely distressed that the policeman took a sympathetic view: "Don't take it so hard, it's not all that serious an offence..."

"Isn't it" the driver cried, "Where's my caravan gone?"

* * *

The policeman spotted a jay walker and decided to challenge him : "Why are you trying to cross here when there's a zebra crossing only fifty feet away?"

"Well" replied the jay walker, "I hope it's having better luck than me."